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Lost and found

Woke up today thinking it was Monday. Actually lost a whole day, or gained one…all depends on how you look at it I guess. Kinda the way it goes, especially when all you do is relive the same day over & over & over again. I miss feeling a sense of purpose… 
Thought that it would help clearing out some stuff from my house, get rid of everything I don’t use or want. Just to have some more space to do what I like. But the more I remove, the more attention I pay to all the things that needs to be done here; Stripping wallpaper, new insulation, new roof, etc. I have a to-do list that’s over 2 meters long, no kidding! …& on top of that I keep finding old keepsakes that makes the whole process even harder, cause I end up reminiscing about things from my past & whoop-de-doodle-there-went-that-day.  But some things I love rediscovering… Especially little tidbits I’ve gotten from people throughout the years. A pressed yarrow in an old diary is one of them. It was given to me by a c…

Pride & prejudice

Imagine something bestial like a rape happens to you… It’s instantly accepted by people as truth, everyone embraces you, looks after you & come to your defence. Your voice is deemed strong & your story is heard by the masses. Now imagine it happening to someone else… The assailant turns out to be an immigrant who can’t speak the language properly, has chosen not to integrate & are clearly living at odds with the law. Might’ve come from a country of war & are mentally disturbed, but still, the rape happened. You start questioning immigration laws, if integration is what it ought to be, mental health screening, etc. & you express that. This time those same people ask for proof of the incident, they embrace & defend the rapist, they call you racist & attack your behaviour. Your voice is silenced & your story is not worthy of attention. 
I’m wondering how things similar to that comes to light? How come one voice is more valid than another? No matter the expe…

Dark ages

Had a lot of stuff running through the old noggin today, been writing it all down too. But, the weekend’s upon us, & frankly - I’d rather show what I’ve been up to today instead… Not the best picture, but here you go:

I've had this desk for many years now. Bought it at a place called Høyvekta Brukthandel, a second hand shop with antiques & other bits & bobs, this was back when it was located on Jeløya. The desk had a weird brownish colour when I got it & stupid me painted it white, & it's been like that until now. Had this huge plan of sanding it down & getting it back to its former wooden glory, but nah... Had some blackboard paint left & voila. Would never ever do that to a piece I was about to sell though. If I'm redesigning or refurbishing stuff it gets sanded down & the whole shabang. Just can't be bothered with my own stuff, then it's all about instant gratification. 

It always feels nice to have a brush in hand. Being creative i…

Patriarchy's honing in.

Scrolling through social media makes me realise that the world’s being dry humped by people with borderline personality disorders. Seriously, who the hell takes pictures of their blood soaked pads & post it online?! Get a f**king grip & some damn self respect while you’re at it.


No, I'm not shocked. What I am is rather nauseated actually. Plus it’s this relentless man bashing going on at the same time that aggravates me. If they’re so appalled by men & can’t stand to be around them, then why not smear the menstruation blood all over their face? Let’s name it Modern feminist war paint…my guess is that it’ll take care of that problem all by itself. Hell, why not go all the way while they’re at it & smear their own sh*t over the rest of their bodies? Even better, let’s bottle that crap up & call it: Man Repellant. It’s organic & fresh! They can bring it everywhere & just lather it on whenever they feel the patriarchy’s honing in on them. 
I always grew up se…

Halo, is it me you're looking for?

Something happened on my brother’s birthday, or what would’ve been his birthday back in May. I’ve never seen anything like it. Was driving home after a couple of hours shopping with my mum…& as always I tried to get a few pictures of the scenery (Nooo, I wasn’t the one driving). Suddenly I looked towards the sun & I saw the most amazing sight. 

Beautiful, right? I just jumped out the car when we got back to the house & went straight out in the street. Got really excited, type fangirl excited...so my neighbours across the street came & looked at it too. They probably thought I was more of a weirdo than I already seem to be, but who cares, I'll bring out the nerd any day for something as gorgeous as that solar halo! Told my mum that it was a pretty neat gift to be blessed with on such a day. You can see more pics & video of it here


My mum had a birthday yesterday & I wish I could’ve been there, felt really shitty staying home. But hopefully I get to see her s…

Hellish...

Been waaay past 30C here today & I haven’t done much to be honest. Pottered around in the garden & tried to stay hydrated, so not much to report really.
I was going to walk a little in the evening, but luckily my neighbour came running after me & invited me to her house. She has an AC & it was kinda like walking out of Mount Doom & into Fimbulwinter. Exaggerating of course. ;) 
I like talking with her, she's got such a warm personality, inquisitive, very sharp & witty, never a dull moment. I love how she talks about the life she had with her husband & how proud she is of her children. It's like being around my grandmothers again...& like her, they always showed me how to appreciate the simple things in life. So eat that bowl of strawberries & remember to pour a little extra vanilla sauce over it... Then go for a stroll around the neighbourhood. Except when the weather's a tad hellish, then seek refuge at the nearest cold spot.
~Linn.
The rai…

Lounge

My dad, accompanied by my son, came bearing gifts yesterday. A sunlounger & a big table that he built. Can’t wait to put it up somewhere in the garden. It makes such a huge difference having a good sized table outside. Great place to gather. Not that I have many people over anymore, but still hoping that'll change someday.
That’s actually the second sunlounger I’ve gotten lately. (A sign that I should get my pale body some colour maybe? ...naaah.) My sweet, sweet neighbour gave me a retro one a few weeks ago. Which made me extremely happy, plus it took me back to when I was little... We used to have those with us to the beach, orange floral pattern & all. I know I say this a lot, but damn I miss the sea… It's like I can smell it & hear it whenever I close my eyes. 
Aaaanyway, getting these things just made me think about the exterior state of my house. It’s a work in progress, to say the least. Plus me being on snail pace doesn’t really help progress either. But, my …

Reliable

According to Egyptian lore hearts were weighed against Maat’s feather in the Hall of Two truths. So your fate was based on whether or not the scale tipped. If it didn’t, you had led a righteous life & could join paradise... If it did your heart was devoured by Ammit & you spent eternity in the underworld…

I sometimes wonder how heavy the hearts are of many on social media. Today I’ve read a lot about how right leaners are somehow gloating about the Norwegian journalist Kadafi Zaman (of Pakistani descent) that are jailed in Pakistan… All because the left had said that Tommy Robinson deserved to go to jail, cause he broke the law. So basically a lot of same coin different side blablabla. I understand the reactions, but shouldn’t the main concern here be that governments are shutting down free speech & the freedom of the press? That elections are being doctored & people who are speaking up against it are systematically shut down? 
But you know what? I find it even more conc…

Snapshots

Wanted to go to the beach today. Not necessarily to go for a swim (Have to lose a ton of weight or get a wearable tent before I do that…), but just to sit on a towel & have something cold to drink & watch the waves roll in...in a big a** hat & my trusted 50 + sunblock of course. Luckily my spinal fluids took care of all that for me, so instead of sand between my toes, I got to lounge around & watch telly all day. Yay…
In late afternoon it got to me a little bit, the same views & the silence, so I kinda begged for pics on Snapchat...

…& lo & behold, the phone started buzzing. I do have some incredibly sweet people on the other end of the ether. They’ve sent me lovely moments of children with smiles as bright as supernovas & laughter that’ll melt any ice clad mountain top…& amazing scenery from around Norway, balcony greetings from little lovelies in Oslo, cold beers being opened in Sweden, laundry being folded & even a glimpse inside a viking camp.…

Hailstorm

I love summer storms… Although today, yet again, I screamed like a little girl when lightning struck. Was leaning out the living room window watching the abrupt hailstorm & out of the blue the god of thunder decided to pay me a visit in my backyard. Felt all tingly inside afterwards... :p  
It does give me some major pressure in my head though… So glad the upside of having I.I.H. is that you don’t have to rely on weather forecasts or especially barometers, cause you are one. #SilverLining! Kidding of course, I never rely on weather forecasts, just look out the bloody window. ;)


The storm today reminded me of when my son was younger & we used to sit & stare out over Moss whenever there were summer storms. We lived high up on Jeløya so had a pretty good view. I miss those days… It goes by fast doesn’t it? Wished I could do it all over again for so long, raise a little one, with a proper family unit…but that never happened. Life ey? …you never know where it takes you.
Hope my in…

Weather you do or don't

How come with many people on both political isles it has to be one way or the other? I don’t get that… Isn’t it possible to have two conflicting thoughts in your head at once? I can be against plastic pollution & still be for driving a huge a** truck that chugs down a bunch of gas, can’t I? 
Oversimplifying here of course, but, I don’t like spraying my plants with pesticides, I even saved a bee from drowning the other day…doesn’t mean I’m totally against conventional farming. I’m for coal, just would like them to reduce the emissions…doesn’t mean I believe that CO2’s something bad, it’s plant food. I also think that the sun has a lot to do with our weather here & that our planet is cyclical driven, like everything else is - seasons, birth, death, etc. 



I also like to look back at what’s happened in history to understand it all better. It’s quite interesting actually, if you sit down & read what archeologists have discovered about climate changes & what that’s done with s…

Illumine

Sometimes the words you long to hear are left unspoken & your light dims because of it… Then, when you’ve almost succumbed to darkness, a distant, but familiar voice whispers & it’s like your entire existence brightens up again.

Fear of negative reactions sometimes makes you put on lead shoes & sink to the bottom of a murky pond of emotions… Where you hold your breath & bide your time, hoping for a drought so the water levels will go down & you’ll breathe fresh air again. But the shoes are still on & monsoon season is lurking around the corner. Guess I’m saying that wether it’s politics, life in general or love…biding your time & getting lost in your own mind, not doing things, speaking out, or asking questions in fear of repercussions or rejection - you shouldn’t let fear or anxiety rule. It’s such a waste of time. It might be that the person you’re longing to be with are hoping for the same…or speaking out at a family dinner about your political views migh…

Beat of the drum

So my house is apparently acting like the local woodpecker’s drum. I’m not opposed a little native drum session, but does it have to be that early in the morning? But, I guess it beats waking up to my cat’s screeching. 
I don’t know, maybe fate’s trying to tell me something with all the animal fanfare? Early bird catches the worm & all that crap…so maybe start going to bed early oooor just get as far away from here as possible for a while? I can honestly say that since last November this place has felt like a prison…a comfy Norwegian prison, but a prison nonetheless. It’s like the warden is the only one who can set me free, but he’s put me in solitaire confinement & forgotten I even exist…so here I am, slowly going a tad looney. ;P 
Bah… I need some shuteye, so enough with this mopey gibberish of mine. I'll leave you with a pic of the gorgeous double rainbow I saw a few hours ago. ;)


~Linn. “Do not take anything for granted - not one smile or one person or one rainbow or one b…

Reap what you sow

The fields around here are slowly turning from green to a mustardy colour. Makes me think of abundance, sustenance & traditions. …& also about how much of it that’s lost. I’m not just talking about the disconnect from traditions & nature, but also the fact that there’s less farmable soil cause of moronic politicians & government employees who hands permissions out (their a**es) to build roads & houses on top of farmland…


My grandparents & great-grandparents had a little veggie patch in their garden, even kept hens. I know, I know, they did it out of necessity & we have stores now & that’s why people don’t need that in their garden, blablabla… I actually don’t agree with that, especially if you have children. Instead of a manicured lawn, dig a part of it up & plant a couple of vegetables with them & if you don’t have a lawn a bucket & some soil will do…just show them where food comes from. Let them harvest & make a meal out of it. The sayi…

Just one of those days...

Waking up before 08:00 on a Sunday by my looney cat isn’t exactly a joyous affair. Was incredibly tired & wanted to go right back to sleep. Guess fate had something else planned though…me, being a tad bit miserable for the better part of the day. 
I just wanted to relax today, get in the right frame of mind for what I had planned for this upcoming week. It started ok, but as the hours went by & the phone kept buzzing, I ended up being frustrated instead. Made me question if people truly listens when I say stuff. My preliminary assessment of that is a big fat juicy NO. 

…anyhow, it hasn’t been all bad though. Got some laundry out of the way & spent some time outside. Listened to some hedgehogs rummaging underneath my back porch (Oh great Goddess, I'm such a bloody snoozZzefest.) & watched the sunset. Which was remarkable this evening & it gave me a bit of a positive boost at least…sooo hopefully I’ll be fit for fight when I wake up tomorrow. If I can sleep, that i…

Sucker for soccer, or...

Today I did something out of the ordinary… I watched the football (soccer) game between England & Sweden. I think the last game I actually saw was Norway vs. Italy back in 1994. Had a huge crush on Roberto Baggio. Have nooo idea what the f**k that was all about though…his sexy mullet perhaps? Haha!  


Sooo, yeah, England won 2-0 & I’m pretty chuffed about that. Got a few angry messages on Snapchat from some Swedish people during the gamle, apparently I should’ve been more supportive. Oh, well... I’ll probably get some angry replies from some English folks too when I’m rooting for England to lose their upcoming game... ;p 
I have very fond memories of watching football with my dad when I was little…or rather him watching & me sitting on the floor playing with my legos. The sounds from the TV still brings forth such a cosy feeling inside of me. It puts a smile on my face as I write this actually. :) But other than that I don’t carry much warmth towards it at all really. But I d…

Through several layers

It gets so quiet in the house when my son & co. leaves, almost like an eerie calmness. I love having them here, there’s always some sort of noise coming from upstairs. Music, laughter, muffled voices...haha! No, not in the sense of someone’s being held hostage up there. But you know, sound travelling through several layers of wood & vinyl...laughter & conversations & the occasional bloody murder - scream in the music studio, all reaches my ears, wrapped in a sorta velvety hue. It usually takes a while to get used to the silence again, but today I’ve been battling with an army of flies who’ve apparently come through the balcony door upstairs sometime these last few days. So not much time to acclimatise with those little jackholes using me as a helipad & repeatedly buzzing in my ears.
…& yeah, I know, I should get a screen door up there. I should get a lot of things for this house really... Earlier today when I was making lunch I wished the kitchen was completely …

Hello darkness my old friend

Midsummer evoked a sense of comfort in me… Mostly because I knew it brought forth longer nights, cozy evenings & roaring fires. But also because at that point summer’s certainly not ready to relinquish its hold for quite some time yet. So people will spend the next couple of months soaking up the warmth of the sun, bury their feet in hot sand, go hiking in the mountains or potter away in their own backyards. Some evenings are spent around bonfires with friends or late night bbqs on the back porch with family...it’s such a great time of year.

Alone or not, don’t let it go to waste. Get out there & enjoy the warmth & bounty of the season, cause sooner than you know, the night will bathe in my favourite light & nature will change its cloak. Admittedly, I yearn for that time of year with cozy sweaters, the smell & colours of autumn. But for now I’m perfectly happy nibbling on the berries in my garden & laying on my son’s old trampoline looking up at the clouds drift…

Quasimodo

Had this plan of waking up early to get some gardening done today… Well, that went straight in the sh*tter from the get go. Woke up around 12:30’ish after a nightmare about something awful happening to my sister. So that basically set the tone for the day…  . I moved like a slug all day, sat on the porch for a while & when I finally got out to start the actual gardening I got attacked by a nasty little black & yellow f**ker who stung me on the side of my face. Made me look like Quasimodo for a little while there. But I put on some plantain leaves right away & went inside & rummaged through my medicine cabinet & found some antihistamines to chuck down just in case. Felt a little woozy at the beginning, but now it just hurts from my jaw & up to my ear, nothing more. Yay… Got some planting done later in the evening, but it wasn’t very enticing being out there after that. But at least I got some of my plants in the ground…



The fourth has almost passed & gone here …

I do

Do you believe in marriage? I thought I did, but now I’m not so sure anymore... It seems to be more like a cesspool of broken dreams & high hopes of a forever after. Do all marriages end up like festering toxic swamps? ...according to some of my acquaintances & old friends they do. I’m wondering when people stop talking & start screaming to each other & replying with snarky remarks? At what point does it go from “I can’t wait to see you” to “Get the f**k away from me”?

Tried to look all contemplative & s**t... I’m quite sure that I’ll never get to experience any of it at first hand. Not that I think I’d ever let it get that bad. But then again, I’m really good at messing up things that’s for sure…  Marriage was always sacred to me, I revered it. Just based on watching my grandparents. I’m sure they had their struggles…but that twinkle in their eyes when they looked at & talked about each other, that never went away. …& they always seemed to choose one another.…

90 000

It’s been a whirlwind of a day, cause my son & co. came home today. They're gonna stay for a few days. It's so lovely to hear sounds coming from upstairs that isn’t my cat screeching like he’s possessed or something. 

Anyway, I was going to write more than this...but the hours just flew by. Sooo I’m just stopping by to say thank you, wherever you are, for taking time out of your day to read the nonsensical babble I spew out here from time to time…over 90 000 have done so & that’s a tad incomprehensible, but it also makes me very happy. Cause time is one of the most precious things we have. So thanks again, for spending some of it on me. 
~Linn.
"Gratitude is the music of the heart, when its chords are swept by the breeze of kindness."~Author Unknown.

Dawn

The birds started chirping just before 04:00 & the scent of dawn filled the air. It’s just a strange time to be awake... Especially if there’s nothing to do, no job to get to, no kids, no love to snuggle up against, nada. You just sit there & stare out at nothing whilst the light fills the room. Just a few hours earlier I was out walking, it was just past midnight & you could still see the pinkish hue in the northwestern sky...
Picture taken in Rakkestad on summer solstice. That’s one of the things I adore about mother north, her seasons are, in lack of a better word, formidable. Although we had a few weeks with extreme temperatures, usually not a fan of those...but I have to admit that I enjoyed that too. It was lovely standing outside feeling a sort of hellfire breeze gently caressing my skin. Anyway, enough about the weather...
I’ve been quite ill lately. In a weak moment, I actually begged to die. It feels kinda ‘off’ to write it, but the i.i.h. is there & there’s no …